YTuesday, April 11, 2006
dunno y i jus feel dat dis world's in a mess all over agn... is lyk wtf. fer sum reason or another, i jus dun feel lyk doin anithin... kinda goin back ta de sucidal mood agn... nth in dis life is real i guess... dere r thins dat cum n go but few stay... i jus feel dat im all alone in dis big world wif no one ard...
mani thins happened recentli... i dun even noe wat's goin on... first it was jan n so soon it became april... n now de o's r comin... cant i hv a break of even a dae... i jus nid tym awae frm dis world... ta sumwhere where dere's no probs or wat so eva... i jus wanna get out of mi life... nowadaes i've been appearin quite hapi... but dis is not de real mi... i dun even noe y m i doin all de thins dat im doin... it jus seems as if sum1 has taken over control of mi...
i feel lyk dyin... life seems so meaningless now... i jus hope dat i hv de courage ta die... i jus feel lyk endin dis life once n fer all... HELP! i eva once promised mi frenz dat i wun ever think of committin sucide eva agn but now it jus seems dat it is back... mi life is jus ruined lyk dat? y mus it b mi? i nid ta get outta dis... is lyk tym n tym agn i feel dis... wen will it eva stop? wat is de cause of it? its happenin ta mi but yet i dun even noe a single thin bout it... i m reali sick n tired of dis kinda life... will sum1 jus help mi outta here? i dunno wat's goin on all over agn... i reali nid a long long rest frm everithin... i jus dun feel lyk wakin up... does dis alwaes happen wen i try ta face reality?
tHeSe ScArS wiLL nEvEr hEaL. bLoOd dRiPpEd At