has my love for you turned into hatred?

which is crazier?

being upset because you don't want to lose the person you love or being upset because you don't know how to tell the person you love how much you love the person?

LOL.

back to mugging... argh. don't get me started on how i hate exams. LIFELESS!!!

~ ttfn ~
` LoVeS `
じゃね

tHeSe ScArS wiLL nEvEr hEaL. bLoOd dRiPpEd At 9:45 PM ``

i realised something recently... it's amazing how you can like someone and act normally when he has a girlfriend but at the same time desperately making the feelings fade away and hoping that he will never find out because you don't want the current friendship to end like that. wow. what a long sentence. amazing! LOL.

anyway, he told me she liked him since the time we sat together. and that was like kind of after i started liking him. but yet he noticed her even though she is so far away. i am so near but yet it seems so far. i no longer am able to talk to him properly, be near him and so on because i just seem to see her around him and it seems like he doesn't remember the past that we used to have anymore. i feel weird. i still remember the times we had. even though they were short but still... especially the time when we went for dinner. =D we never managed to have the cup of hot chocolate at McCafe together...

now, he is with her. happy or not i really have no idea. but one thing i am sure is that i will never tell him how i feel. i am afraid of the outcome. i don't want to go any further unless i can be sure that if i tell him how i feel the end result is that we will be together... which i think, will not happen. but still, I CAN'T FORGET HIM. pig!

tHeSe ScArS wiLL nEvEr hEaL. bLoOd dRiPpEd At 5:10 PM ``

since all the memories of him is here, i shall write it here. anyway, can't help but to miss him a little. things are weird. i don't know why i'd miss him. is not like he is perfect or anything. but just miss him.

things i'd really miss? the hugs, the cheering up, his smell? his arms around mine... there to cheer me up when i am sick...

i really miss him. haiz. maybe it was because i didn't meet him and his friends that things turn out this way... i don't know. weird.

tHeSe ScArS wiLL nEvEr hEaL. bLoOd dRiPpEd At 9:15 PM ``

hey... i am not in a relationship... haha. many people have been asking me if i am fine (relationship context). of course i'm fine. being single is always problem-free... haha. anyway, i like i have posted, i did mention what kind of a boyfriend i am looking for... LOL. it sounds like i am buying something. HAHA. but anyway, yar. read the post on Sunday 10 june 2007 and you peeps will get what i mean... =P =x

tHeSe ScArS wiLL nEvEr hEaL. bLoOd dRiPpEd At 6:53 PM ``

bring me home. back to you. i don’t want to live without You. You kept me here and didn’t give up. but yet i ignored You. You never let me fall. You are always here. the best and only thing i can ask for is You. thank you. if only i can run to You and give You the tightest hug, i will. i really want You now. let the fire in me burn once again. burn like it has never burn before. burn like how it burnt when i first knew You. when i first love You. i'm sorry for all that i have done. no words can express the feelings i feel right now. i am suddenly so lost. without You i no longer know how to walk. i want to hold You and walk with You now. please let me see the light. let me know what is right and what’s not. i want to come back. i want him to lose. i want to win the war. conquer him. be a light to You. to be Your little princess. i want to give this whole life to You. from now on, i promise that i will live every single second with You. i will no longer neglect You no matter what. let me win this. please. i know i made this promise many times already. but this time, it will really be the last. i will never break it again. promise. i will leave everything behind and live every second with You from now on.

tHeSe ScArS wiLL nEvEr hEaL. bLoOd dRiPpEd At 3:36 PM ``